Fish-Flavored Baseball Bat

It's a John Cleese reference.

Monday, December 31, 2007

2007 Remembered

As the year draws to a close, it's time once again to look back and remember those we've lost...those characters we've lost, that is. Here, then, is the roster of DC and Marvel characters who departed in 2007. As with last year's memorial list, I'm sure I'm leaving off several people...and there's always the distinct possiblity that some of these will be back.


Vic Sage
Young Frankenstein
Duela Dent
The Deep Six
Speed Queen
Dr. Bedlam
Power Boy
The entire population of Earth-15
Annataz (Zatanna of Earth-3)
Psimon (again)
Monica Rappaccini (she'll probably be back...)
Puppet Master (oh, he'll definitely be back...)
The Owl (he may come back, but I don't really care...)
Bart Allen
Ralph Dibny
Big Barda

and, keeping with the Oscar tradition of saving the "biggest name" for last...

Steve Rogers.


Monday, December 24, 2007

It Will Do Everything in Its Power to Get You to Twinkle

From the fine folks at Sketchworks, a warning on the dangers of the Christmas Spirit:

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Saturday, December 22, 2007

What I Sang 12-22

The last karaoke night of the year at CB South:

"Jingle Bell Rock" by Bobby Helms.
"I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas" by Gayla Peevey (since Jessica & DQ missed it last week).
"You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" by Thurl Ravenscroft.
"Snoopy's Christmas" by The Royal Guardsmen.

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Lookin' Good & Mouthin' Off

Listening to Kelly Hogan's CD "Because It Feel Good," it occurred to me how well "Sugarbowl" (one of my favorite tracks on an album chock-full of good songs) applied to the friendship of Big Barda and Zinda Blake. Just substitute "mega-rod" for "tire iron":

We had some hard ones, didn't we, boys?
Remember those mornings?
Remember that white, white day
When you wielded my tire iron?
Kickin' and cussin'...
But damn if you didn't get it up again.

Hey there Sugarbowl,
My little Miss Solid Gold,
You were always a lady,
Just like a lady should be.
And I know times were bad,
But looking back inside my head,
The mountaintops are all that I can see.

Hey there Sugarbowl,
My little Miss Solid Gold,
You were always a lady,
Just like a lady should be.
And I miss you still,
I reckon I always will,
You were my ideal of beauty.

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Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Well, This Sucks...

I was in a car accident today.

Luckily, nobody was hurt, but it'll be a while before I'll know how badly my car is damaged. I did manage to arrange it with my insurance and pick up a rental car, but I'll be doing as little driving as possible while I've got it. I probably shouldn't discuss the accident itself...suffice it to say that it was the fault of the other guy. And yet, since "the other guy" is a 16-year-old kid, I can't really bring myself to be too upset with him (even though I feel like I should).

So, as you can imagine, my mood has been constantly cycling between anger and frustration at the situation, and thankfulness and relief that it wasn't a lot worse.


Tuesday, December 18, 2007

10 Things I Learned from Comics This Year

Inspired by Melashaan (and thanks to Kalinara for pointing it out), here are ten things I learned from comics in 2007.

1. The kitchen is a dangerous place.

2. It is possible to continue a series after the death of the title character, with no drop in quality.

3. The Laughing Mask makes Frank Castle look like a softie.

4. "Special relationship" is a completely innocuous phrase, with no coded meaning whatsoever...right?

5. Nobody likes pomegranate margaritas.

6. You can kill a shape-changing alien by breaking its neck.

7. You can't kill a shape-changing alien by breaking its neck.

8. When you're shackled to somebody else and you're both running for your lives, the most important thing is to constantly comment on the other person's sexuality.

9. Speedball, Mary Marvel, and Plastic Man should not be "dark."

10. Tony Stark is a dick.


Sunday, December 16, 2007

What I Sang 12-15

From last night at CB South, an eclectic assortment of holiday songs:

"Another Rock & Roll Christmas" by Gary Glitter.
"A Christmas Carol" by Tom Lehrer. (There doesn't appear to be a Lehrer performance of it on YouTube, but here's a nice cover version.)
"I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas" by Gayla Peevey.

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Friday, December 14, 2007

Friday Night Fight: Lights Out!

Hey, Lamplighter! (tap-tap on the shoulder...)

(From Green Lantern #60, five fingers of shock for Bahlactus, and two cheeks of awe for SallyP)

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Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Get Away from the Dynamite! It's Gonna Blow!

Saturday night, I went to the first show of Chick & Boozy Holiday Cruise, this year's edition of the more-or-less annual holiday extravaganza from Dad's Garage starring Chick Starley (star of Danger Cop, Danger Cop II, and Danger Cop 4: Gross Miscalculation) and Boozy the Imp (magical, whimsical imp from the 9th dimension).

As usual for Chick & Boozy, it was a hilarious, uncontrolled show, guaranteed to delight, amuse, and make you really uncomfortable. There will be two more shows (Dec. 15 and 22 at midnight), and they'll be different each time, with special surprise guests. The first show featured appearances by Rip Taylor and the late Jerry Clower...however, since Travis Sharp is going back home, they won't be making a return appearance in the remaining shows. As for the other celebrity guests (Ricardo Montalban, Bobcat Goldthwait, the ghost of Don Knotts, and the Vagina Power woman)--well, some may be back, or they might not. You never know with Chick & Boozy!
For those of you not in the Atlanta area who can't come to the show, enjoy the trailer for Danger Cop 4: Gross Miscalculation.

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Friday, December 07, 2007

Friday Night Fights: A Sack of Jello with Ears!

From Ditko's World #2: Mr. Quiver shows why he's the Ultimate (Friday Night) Fighting Machine.

That's right, it's a double-edged shout-out to Bahlactus and Blockade Boy!

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Thursday, December 06, 2007

The Death of Superman-Prime

This is not speculation on when or how it will happen (though I'm pretty sure it'll be soon)...just a little flight of fancy as to what happens afterwards.


"You think that can stop me, you idiots? Nothing can stop me! I'm SUPERMAN!"

"They did stop you, Clark."

He turned towards the soft, gentle voice beside him, and was surprised to see a petite, pale woman. The whiteness of her skin stood in sharp contrast to her wild, ebony mop of hair and her ensemble--black camisole, black leather belt, black pants, black boots, offset only by the gleaming silver ankh pendant around her neck. More surprising than her sudden appearance, though, was the way she carried herself. He had grown accustomed to looks of terror or unbridled fury...but this woman was smiling casually.

Instinctively, he knew what she, who she was. And yet, he still couldn't quite bring himself to accept it.

"I'm not dead," he insisted, "and you're not Death. Death is supposed to be a skeleton in a robe and hood. You don't even have a scythe!"

She had occasionally heard this before, but most spoke these words with relief or bemusement. This time, though, there was a tone of whiny, bitter petulance, as though this were simply one more way the universe had failed to meet his preconceptions.

"I tried a scythe once," she chuckled. "I met a farmer who let me borrow his. It was pretty awkward, and I couldn't quite get the hang of it...but it was fun."

"Wait a minute," he protested. "Death isn't supposed to smile! Unless..." a glimmer came to his eyes as he drew upon his knowledge of this comic-book world. "I get it! The white skin, the completely opposite've got to be Bizarro-Death!"

She laughed out loud. "Wow, I never heard that one before! I've got to tell that to my sis...she'll really appreciate it."

"Great, even Death is laughing at me," he pouted. "Why should I be surprised? Everyone hates me."

"Oh," she said, placing a supportive hand on his shoulder, "I don't hate you. I don't hate anyone."

"Why were they all against me? All I wanted was to bring back the real world."

"Clark," she said, "I know how easy it can be to think that yours was the only real world, and the rest were only imaginary...stories...but believe me, they're all real." She looked directly in his eyes. "And I meet everybody on every single one of them."

"You're judging me," he snapped. "I thought you said you didn't hate me! You're just another liar, just like everyone else in these messed-up universes."

"Oh, Clark," she smiled. "I wasn't lying. But sometimes, being a friend means calling you on your bullshit."

For once, he could muster no response to this.

"Ready?" she asked.

He nodded sullenly.

"Clark," she said as she took his hand, "I'm sorry you never got to grow up."

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Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Shameless Self-Promotion

Just wanted to mention that tonight at 8:00, my improv class will be performing their graduation show at Dad's Garage. Admission is free (though donations are welcome), and a fun time is guaranteed* for all.

*not a binding legal guarantee

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Sunday, December 02, 2007

The Marvel Counterpart of Superman-Prime

Kalinara's post on Superman-Prime got me thinking. Let's see, a character who's designed as a "fanboy" stand-in, complaining when their universe doesn't match "the way comics should be," and is, for all intents and purposes, unbeatable.

Does this sound like anybody in the Marvel Universe?

That's right...

The Earth-616 counterpart of Superman-Prime is...


The difference, of course, is that while Prime destroys everything he doesn't like, Squirrel Girl's reaction to a world that's "not right" is just to BE the hero she wants everyone to be like.

Well, that, and the fact that Geoff Johns writes Prime as an attack on the "fanboy" mentality, and Dan Slott writes Squirrel Girl as a celebration of it.

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